hysterectomy at 30 

yep you heard that right, i am getting a hysterectomy. if you haven’t followed my story you may need jump back and get a little history. starting with the fact that i have endometriosis. then a little over a year a ago i very difficult experience with getting my IUD, more on that story here. and my bleeding finally stopped for a couple months but then last may, i was on vacation and had this terrible pain, i was sure it had moved, it felt like a tooth pick was poking the inside of my uterus constantly, and i started bleeding super heavy. ever since i have had a pretty heavy monthly 7-day periods. fully equipped with my nasty cramps and all. one of the two reasons we went with the IUD was to get rid of the periods so I wouldn’t deal with this extra monthly pain from my periods. clearly my body didn’t get the memo. so my OB started me back on continue cycle birth control to try to manage the bleeding and after a few months i stopped having the monthly periods and i was down to bleeding like once a week, but it was perfectly random and accompanied by a very deep uterine pain that would make me double over, i would need to breath through the pain like a very intense contraction, it would last a couple minutes and release. but a couple more months later and still no change. yet my hormones just seem to be out of whack, for the past 6 months i’ve been struggling with acne, and i’ve really never had skin problems.

at my last appointment with my internal doc, i’ve talked about her in the past. she is what i call my puppet master. she takes a birds eye look at my health issues and makes sure all the specialists are working together and keeps everything in check. and as she was reviewing everything she felt this had just gone on for too long and needed my OB’s attention. she was suggesting a uterine hysterectomy but ultimately felt my OB needed to do an examine and give her recommendation. i was able to get right in, and she quickly came to the same conclusion.

the surgery is scheduled in 3 weeks. it will be a 2 day hospital stay and a 4 week recovery. she will be able to do it vaginally because I delivered my babies vaginally. she will also do a laparoscopy and burn off any endometriosis & scar tissue at the same time.

i thought i was fine, but on the way to the appointment i felt a pretty intense wave of anxiety. it just became really real. i think i felt really alone. plus, i had my little guy along which i don’t have to spell out why you don’t necessarily want your 2-year old at your OB appointment, plus i was just emotionally over whelmed but i was still on duty so i couldn’t really go there. so after the decision was made, the appointment was set i was toast.

thankfully each day comes with new graces of its own. and i was just so thankful i had spent the last 2 years grieving & accepting that we were done having kiddos, more on that here. and that i didn’t have to make this decision the day beckham was born. so i really am good with the whole thing. i am looking forward to less pain. i know that day will most likely come with another wave of emotions, attached to finality of it all. but for now i am doing well.


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